My Heart is Steady

Today was probably one of the worst days of my life. Today I lost a little girl who was like a little sister and I failed God many times.... I let Him down. But then I realized.....

How can we let Him down if He's the one holding us up?

It's so true we're not holding Him up so how can we let Him down? He is holding us up! He is the Lord of all creation! Sometimes I'll look in the mirror and ask myself how can anyone look at me and not vomit?! but what I did right there was just basically insult God. Think of it like this you're in art class you make the most beautiful picture you've ever made in your life and someone who you love so much or your best friend says it looks horrible. That's a major insult and it upsets you. That's what you and I are doing to God when we call ourselves ugly.

When we sin against God and we don't want to do it again it sometimes hurts to not do it again because God is leading us away from the sin and Satan is pulling us sooo strongly towards it. It hurts you but you have no idea how much it hurts God. He made you and you are listening to His enemy. It's like you and your friends are hanging out and the bully comes and takes all your friends away. That's how God feels.

So to my title "My Heart is Steady" during my rough night I turned to a friend and she told me to say that 10 times out loud. But I didn't understand what it meant. So I asked her and she said.... "My heart is steady" means that God is holding your heart in His hands. it means that no matter what happens, HE IS HOLDING YOU. you can't be upside down when God is holding you right side up" Wow.... that's all I can say.... so today I'd like to promise the whole World and The Lord that I will now live for Him faithfully no more sinning, failing Him and stuff like that! I am a daughter of the one true God and I want to act like it!

Drew xoxo

My Angel

Cancer is a very common word in my house. It usually comes into conversation, but when I was 11 I hadn't really heard of this horrible thing that we call Cancer. Until one February day I got home from grade 7? or 6? I don't really know it doesn't really matter. My mom worked from home on Wednesday afternoons and I just got home I could tell she was stressed. They had been talking about my Auntie Rhonda quite a lot and I always questioned what's wrong? is she okay? and that horrible afternoon my mom told me my dear Auntie Rhonda at age 40 had Breast Cancer. I remember sitting down and crying with my mom that afternoon because it was the first time I heard that word "Cancer" in a person that I loved so very dear! She got her treatments and shorty after maybe a year she was in remission.

We decided we were going home that Christmas home being Scotland. Little did we know it'd be her last healthy Christmas and her last Christmas spent with her brother (my dad). We all gathered around her 21 year old, her 8 year old, and her 4 year old and we opened gifts and had an amazing time the next day we went to my other aunts and had a Canada party it was awesome! We then left Scotland to come back to Canada.

It was probably December 2012 when I found out that the Cancer was back but back to stay. She was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer they didn't know how long she'd live but they knew she wouldn't last very long.

In March 2013 things got bad and never got better. They took her to a hospice in the middle of March and my dad went back home. A week after my dad's return at about 11:30am The Lord called my Auntie Rhonda home. She died beside her sister and her oldest son.


Today is her 43rd birthday...

I love you auntie rhonda and reading this over brings tears... forever in my heart you'll stay<3

Happy Birthday!

 Your Niece,

Drew xoxo

The Love of Christ

I find the love of Christ amazing... I'm sure most Christians do, but if you're an atheist and reading this I'd love it if you kept reading.....


When I first became a Christian at the age of 14. I felt like a small child in Christianity... I asked one of my friends how can I be saved? and she said ask Jesus into your heart. Which is something that i feel like a mother would tell their young child. I really didn't know what it meant at the time to be saved and sometimes I still don't. But days like these I'm praising God it was just a simple normal Sunday church at 8am home at 1pm and then eat lunch and clean then back at 530pm until 730pm and people may say that's such a boring day. Well it's not... throughout the day I got to see my friends who I've been so blessed with and  we had a lovely snow storm. The snow storm's beauty showed there really was a God. I wouldn't have all this if I didn't ask my friend that day how could I be saved.

Also the little things day in and day out like when your crush looks at you, you have a nice lunch, it's nice weather outside or when you get that overwhelming feeling of love from a higher power..... you can feel God's love. I know some of those may sound silly but that was written in a book years and years before you were born that little tiny moment was made by a HUGE ALMIGHTY God. I just think that's amazing.

I love God<3